The In Between

My friend, Jennifer, recently shared a hiking analogy as related to her life. She shared how often times when we set out on a hike, on a new adventure, it can be broken up into three parts: the start, the summit, and the in between. Her analogy, which I self named “the in between” has stuck with me ever since I came across it.

At the start of a hike, we are pumped up with energy for the adventure that lies ahead. We haven’t yet started the process that is the climb. We haven’t yet expended the physical energy that goes with any and all hikes. We are wide eyed, have fresh legs, and are super excited to get going on the trail.

On the other end, there is the summit. When we reach it, we are once again pumped up with energy and excitement for having reached our goal, the top of the mountain. We are excited to take in the beautiful views. We feel on top of the world, closer to the Universe, and like we can do absolutely anything after having made it to the summit.

And then, there is “the in between”. The part of the hike that starts when the trail head you first stepped onto, when that beginning point, has faded enough out of view that it’s just out of reach in your mind, and at the same time, the summit is too far away still to see, feel, or touch. And so there we are, hiking along, somewhere in the middle, often with no epic views like we would hope to see at the summit. During the in between, we are often surrounded by nature, perhaps tall tress, chirping birds, the elements on that given day, and a trail that seems to go for days. A trail that lies both ahead of us and behind us, and of course the trail blazes seen here and there to keep guiding us along the path.

The in between can sometimes seem cumbersome. One foot in front of the other, at times losing true presence in the monotony of stepping, stepping, stepping…

How long have I been hiking for already? How much further until I reach my summit? Where did that burst of energy I had at the start go? What snacks did I bring? Will I even make it to the top today?

And for me, the in between is where the magic happens. It’s where I have time to think. It’s where ALLLL the thoughts start swirling in my brain. It’s where I process moments and experiences from my own personal life. It’s where I learn about myself and often figure out something new about myself. It’s where I work my mental muscle to make it grow stronger and stronger with every step forward. It’s where I push myself to continue, onwards and upwards, to the summit.

The in between is where all the real, hard, gritty work gets done. It’s where my boots get wet, my gloves get mud covered from gripping on tight as I contort and slide my body around sharp rock faces and pull myself up, one step closer to that epic view that awaits. The in between is where I breathe harder and heavier, where the sweat starts to bead from my elbow creases, and where I exercise my mental strength and belief that I CAN DO THIS!

I fucking love the in between.

I fucking love the hard work and the process that leads me up, up and away, to a new elevation, to a new level, to a new peak.

I love feeling my body work. I love feeling myself getting stronger, physically, mentally, and spiritually. I love the fact that I always feel closer to the Universe when I envelop myself in nature, in the woods, in the dirt, in all the elements, and I have the time to take it all in. And I love that every damn time I make it THROUGH the in between, through the hard, sometimes monotonous shit, I feel unstoppable. I remember with every ounce of my body that I truly am limitless. I remember that magic is real because I have seen it with my own two eyes, felt it in my own bones, and experienced it throughout my entire adventure.

When I worked with Dave Ames (the best running coach I’ve ever had!) to train for a few marathons, he would tell me he didn’t meet too many athletes that enjoyed the process of training, of pushing, of preparing physically, mentally, and spiritually for race day. He shared that most athletes he had worked with were all about their finish time come race day and that I was different than most.

For me, when I was training for and running marathons, it wasn’t about the clock when I crossed the finish. Yes, that was amazing, but for me, it was about the process. It was about the in between…the space and time where I found myself experiencing personal growth and experiencing the strength of my own body and my own mind. It was about the daily grind, the track workouts, the speed drills, the hill repeats, the long runs, the early mornings, all the hard work that was put in day in and day out to ultimately get to that finish line. The in between was my own time to work through the hard shit. It was my own time to grow. It was where I was able to process all that this life throws our way.

Every finish line I have crossed, every summit I have reached, every journey I have been on, I have come out on the other side a slightly different, better version of me.

The New Year that is upon us does not feel like a marked line where something will end and something new will begin. I am sure that I won’t wake up on January 1, 2021, blink my eyes, and suddenly a whole new world will appear. And quite frankly, I wouldn’t want that to be the case.

As I think back on 2020, I am not wishing it away. Despite its challenges, I had the opportunity to start so many new, beautiful, amazing adventures in this one life I get to live. I choose to focus on THAT. I choose to focus on my personal growth and on all of those moments and experiences, large, small, and everything in between, that impacted my life in 2020. I choose to focus on the fact that this year has led me here, right here, smack dab in the middle, to the in between, where magic is happening every damn day.

This year blessed me with…

The magic of launching my own business and all of the hard, rewarding work that comes with that…and the gift of creating something that is all my own.

The magic of getting to guide my Wellness Coaching clients along their path…and the gift of getting to see them “wake up” and experience magic themselves.

The magic of my two little loves growing, learning, teaching me, challenging me…and the gift of getting to be their Mom.

The magic of meeting someone that the Universe placed in my path…and the gift of getting to love him and be loved by him exactly as I am.

The magic of creating a village of giving individuals who have been supporting me and continue to lift me up as I embark on this sacred journey to the summit of Mount Kilimanjaro…and the gift of this journey to what will prove to be the largest summit I have ever reached with, no doubt, the most epic views.

The magic of believing in a cause…and the gift of feeling those around me catch my belief and hop on the journey with me to give back so generously to the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society.

And last but not least, the magic of finally using my voice and allowing myself to show up exactly as I am, right here on the page… and the gift of getting to share my words with all of YOU with the intent to inspire you, leave you feeling hopeful, and lead you on your way to your own epic summits that lie ahead.

So this year when the ball drops, when you (virtual) hug your loved ones tight to celebrate another year gone by, ask yourself, “Is this truly a marked end or a marked new beginning…or am I somewhere in the in between?”

Perhaps, like me, you just might find that you’re smack dab in the middle, right in the thick of all the amazing things. Perhaps you will realize that you too are experiencing the in between and believe and know with every ounce of your body and soul that something, SOMETHING, lies just ahead of you, that the path you are on is full of magic if you just stop to look around, and that when you come out on the other side, when you work through the nitty gritty, you will be forever changed…a slightly different, better version of YOU.

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Thanksgiving Day 2020: My Gift to You