Several weeks ago, my daughter woke up at 6:45 AM, a bit later than usual for school.  She didn’t have time to go through her normal morning routine and instead was rushing to get out the door.  So after her day was done she must have reflected back on it because as we were getting ready for bed, this is what she said to me.

“I felt a bit tired at school today because I didn’t leave myself enough time to stretch this morning.  Can you please set my alarm for 6:30 tomorrow so I have plenty of time?”

You see, a big part of my daughters’ morning routine in stretching, which I only knew at the time because I had walked in early one morning to wake her only to find her still in her pajamas, just out of bed, stretching her little body.  It was then that she shared with me that stretching helps her feel ready to tackle her day...her words, not mine. 

And so the next day, and almost every day since, she has woken up at 6:30 AM to get her stretching in and tackle whatever lies ahead in her day. 

She is eight. 

I wish I knew at eight years old that my morning routine could set me up to win the day ahead or leave me feeling “a bit tired”.  I wish I knew that I held that power to kick my day off right each and every day. 

I’ll be the first to admit, getting out of bed can feel hard.

Picture it…

The alarm clock goes off and with one eye half open, still in a dreamlike state nestled warmly under the cocoon of your covers, you reach your arm out and over and fumble to find the snooze button.  “I’ll just hit it once”, you think to yourself, and back to sleep you go, but just as you are drifting back off to dreamland, the alarm buzzes again and bam, your reflexes kick in and you smash the snooze button like it’s part of a whack a mole game. You lay there, mind racing, heart beating faster, feeling tension and stress rising as you think about the day ahead – the project, the meeting, the kids, the groceries, what’s for dinner - all the while fighting to fall back to sleep, but that never really happens does it?  And so, by the time you jump out of bed, you feel rushed as you race to the shower, grab your coffee, and barely make it out the door on time.  Your world is on overdrive, along with your mind and your body, and you’re exhausted from it all.  It’s no wonder!  You have expended copious amounts of mental energy and made countless unnecessary decisions all before even getting out of bed to begin your day. 

THAT is a routine…and it’s one we want to adjust as soon as possible to make for a better outcome in our day.

Many sources suggest that on average, we make 35,000 decisions each day so it is not surprising that so many of us suffer from decision fatigue. 

Decision fatigue is the idea that with each decision we make in a day, it becomes more difficult to make the next decision.  So the more decisions you have to make in day, the harder it becomes to do so because your brain is exhausted from it all! 

Enter routines…

Routines, while they can feel challenging to implement, once built, require less mental energy, less mental spend, and fewer decisions to be made (Sayonara decision fatigue!) because our mind knows exactly where they are going next.  When we build and lean into positive routines first thing in our day, we not only feel better and more in control, but we are also reserving mental energy that otherwise would have been spent so that we can use it later in the day when we may very well need it.   

Morning routines in particular have been shown to improve mood, reduce stress, improve mental clarity, increase mental resilience, and improve energy levels overall, amongst other benefits.  According to an articleby Luna Greenstein shared by the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), it is important to keep the first hour of your day as consistent as possible.

So what does an effective morning routine look like?

As I was doing research a few months back for a new workshop, Building Your Daily Routine for Success:  How to Avoid Burnout & Win Your Day, I noticed that the majority of suggested morning routines seemed totally unrealistic, especially for someone looking to build one for the first time.  If you haven’t already, go ahead and Google “successful morning routines”.  You’ll be exhausted just reading about them!  The majority required waking up at some ungodly hour each day, required an hour or two of time, and involved about 12 different activities.  

If you are building a morning routine for the first time or looking to revamp yours because it’s just not working for you, here are six tips to help increase the odds that your morning routine is a success.

1) Just start.  If you want a different result, you must take a different action.  When your alarm goes off, rip off the band-aid and get yourself out of bed.  Avoid delaying the inevitable and expending unnecessary mental and physical energy by hitting snooze and instead, lean into starting your day.  If this sounds impossible because you and snooze are BFF’s, check out this podcast episode where Mel Robbins explains “The 5 Second Rule”, a technique I personally have used to help stop snoozing, amongst other things. 

2) Keep it simple. Your routine doesn’t need to be complicated, it doesn’t need to be two hours long, and it shouldn’t add stress to your day.  Simplicity is key, especially in the beginning.  “Simple” could look like five minutes of journaling, practicing gratitude upon waking, making your bed, listening to a 10 minute guided meditation, drinking a glass of water, taking a walk around the block, or a brief series of morning stretches. This is your routine so make it work for you!

3) Timing is everything.  Do it at a time that makes sense. That could be 5 AM if you’re an early riser. It could be closer to 8 AM after the kids have gone off to school for the day.  It could even be done in your car.  There is no right or wrong time to kick your routine off, just the best time for YOU!

4) Make it work for you. Don’t try to copy someone else’s routine that simply makes no sense in your life. You’re only setting yourself up to feel defeated, the complete opposite of what we are going for.  Instead, think about perhaps taking one or two tips from others that interest you and molding them into your world, creating a morning routine that aligns with YOU. 

5) Be consistent. Small daily actions lead to massive forward progress and positive change so don’t miss two days in a row.  As James Clear says in Atomic Habits, "The first mistake is never the one that ruins you. It is the spiral of repeated mistakes that follows. Missing once is an accident. Missing twice is the start of a new habit."  Life will happen.  Inevitably you will have a day that you hit snooze, wake up late, or get derailed.  Like with my daughter, not getting to enjoy your morning routine will be THE reminder you need to return to it the following morning. If you slip up, acknowledge it and then, do yourself a huge favor and get back on track right away. 

6) Be kind to yourself.  This is a learning process.  You are likely starting something brand new and all new things take practice.  Celebrate your successes and when things go awry know that you have not failed.  It will all be OK.  You are, after all, only human.  You are learning.  You are adjusting.  You are growing.  Give yourself a bit of grace.  The goal here is progress, never perfection.

What does your morning routine consist of?

What is one thing you do each morning so that you feel ready to tackle the day ahead?

What is one shift you can make today to set yourself up for a better outcome tomorrow?

No matter your age, you have the power to develop a positive morning routine and set yourself up to win the day ahead.  If you want a different outcome, you must take a different action.  It’s time to flex that muscle and make for better outcomes in your day to day. 

YOU CAN DO THIS!